Listening on Repeat

When I was a kid I knew someone who would make mixtapes of just the same song, as many times as could fit, so that he could listen to it all day. This was just in the last years of the Sony Walkman, before CD players took over, and repeat buttons changed the game. But at that time, to manually rewind back to the start of the song you had just heard took time and guesswork, and this guy didn’t have patience for that, he had to have it NOW.

Ok, I’ve dated myself here, but I can still remember my awe and wonder and finding this out. The pure simplicity of the idea didn’t detract from what I immediately recognized not just as genius, but also as unabashed acceptance - no, celebration - of his relationship, in that moment, with that one song. This wasn’t laziness (making a mixtape was a lot of work), this was doing what it took to be able to hear that song again and again, without breaks, without having to leave that musical world for even a minute. He was giving himself permission to do something that at the time, I didn’t even know was possible.

Do you ever have a moment like that with a song?

Maybe it’s a new discovery, maybe it’s a song you know well, but for some reason, right now, it’s sticking to you. Letting your music player move on to the next track just feels wrong, like it would break some kind of spell, and so you hit that repeat button (it’s oh so easy now, isn’t it?), and dive in for another ride. You search out different versions of the song on youtube, or if you play an instrument, you learn the chords, or memorize every word. 

Songs have an incredible ability to stick with us, to us, inside of us, and become part of the fabric of who we are. We see it in phrases like “that’s my jam,” or “this is our song.” We identify with songs, and they take on personal meaning for us that may not even have anything to do with what the songwriter intended. 

Sticking with it

For many of the people I work with, getting the things they want to “stick” is a challenge. I often hear things like “I know that’s logically true, but it doesn’t feel real to me” or “I can feel that right now, but I know it won’t last.” 

Especially with feelings like self-worth, confidence, or hope, it can be hard to move those things from the logical, understanding part of your brain, to the feeling, intuitive, embodied part - the place where things last, and really become a part of how you see yourself. 

Let the music guide you

When that happens, we often look for those songs, either something that’s already sticky for you, or else we’ll look together for something that matches, something that makes you say “oh yes, I recognize this, this music knows how I’m feeling.” And then we’ll dive in. We’ll allow ourselves to listen deeply, often several times over. We may move to the music, read the lyrics, or use a technique called Music and Imagery to play with the visual imagery that the music invokes.

However it is that we dive in, this is a chance to let the music guide you for a minute, to let it take you where you need to go. Because what’s certain is, that music is sticky for a reason. There’s something there that you need, and when you let the music stick to you, there’s more than likely something else that’s going to stick too. 

Try it out for yourself

Do you have a song that’s stuck with you in a meaningful way? Have you allowed yourself to listen to it on repeat like that? For 20 minutes? An hour? What do you notice when you do that? What changes on the 4th listen as compared to the first? On the 24th? What happens if you draw while you listen, or move your body, or hum along? 

If you have an experience of diving into a song like that, I’d love to hear about it! To share your story or if you’re interested in working with me, reach out today through my contact page, or by emailing me at alhobermanlcat@gmail.com

Happy listening!

Al